Left turns

I was going down Studewood today in the right lane today, and somebody beeped "hi!" at me when I turned across the left lane and into oncoming traffic so i could make it to the gas station! He was so cute in that little white car that I think he was making a pass at me so I dropped my cell phone!!

OMG, DRIVING IS SO HARD!

I take issue with this article

From the Telegraph:

Women and gay men are likely to be the worst drivers, a new study has shown. Research has revealed that both perform poorly in tasks involving navigation and spatial awareness when compared to heterosexual men.

OK, fine! Whee! Like this is news! But this is what is all kinds of wrong!

Be afraid: Women or gay men could be behind the wheel of any car

Oh Mary, errr, Sarah, I don't think so. Not any car. At least, not statistically speaking.

Oh and it gets worse:

The research team, led by Dr Qazi Rahman, used virtual reality simulations of two common tests of spatial learning and memory developed at Yale University.

In one, volunteers had to swim through an underwater maze to find a hidden platform, while the second involved exploring radial arms projecting from a central junction to receive 'rewards' .

Well clearly the study is flawed. The gay men were looking for each other, derrr. Who knows what the lesbians were up to.

DNE THIS, Federal Government Agency!

Oh this f'ing annoys me. I just want to turn left against traffic into the post office at this very busy intersection - 11th and Yale, and they have the gall to put this bloody Do Not Enter sign up!

Well nobody tells me what to do, the Federal Government can DNE this! I drove right through it twice today, and once that weird asshole in the Green Rover I see a lot honked to say "HI!" but with his middle finger!

How ho-ho-holiday ru-ru-rude!

I mean, he almost hit me while I was just minding my own personal space and desires. Well screw him anyway. And you too. The holidays have just ruined my happy mood.

Stay tuned for next year, I will re-medicate and be in a better mood.

Bye Bye!

My Holiday Gift to You

Hi everybody!! I wrote this little tune all by myself just for you! You can memorize and hum it to yourself when you are not on the phone!

This road is my road

It is not your road

I just mind my space

Get out of my SUV's way

From the Baytown refineries

To Katy Mills

This road is my road

[repeat as needed until...]

I gotta go, phone's ringing

driving after xmas

It's hard to drive in Houston after Xmas when you have idiots in the way.

OMG!! DANGER TRAIN!!

Hi everybody! Hee Hee!

I have been really busy driving all around over the long weekend, did you drive safely? Did you pay attention to your personal space? Did you make sure your drinks were super sized?

Anyway, I thought I would show you something extra scary about how driving is hard. I find driving inside the 610 Loop hard - all those potholes and bohemians! And I never drive downtown! Why? Well, it's hard! There are these silver train things for the poor people to ride, which confuses me. Why is Amtrak running through downtown? Anyway, here is a video about how these meany trains hunt down poor defenseless drivers like us just minding our our own space and mash up our cars!!



For more information about these Danger Trains, be sure to visit Blog Houston!! They always have something to say about them!!

But most importantly, be careful out there! Don't drive downtown!! Don't enter the 610 loop!!

towing and holiday tips

Hee hee! Hi everybody!!

Here's me the other day with my laundry bag! I could not fit it anywhere in the car, so decided instead to tow it. Thank God for my big brutish, powerful late-model Honda Accord!

Hey today is a busy busy busy driving day, the day before Thanksgiving! BE CAREFUL out there, because Driving is Hard!

Now here are some tips for your travels this Holiday weekend:

--> Stay focused on your personal space.

--> Make sure you have all your important driving tools:

1. Cell phone
2. Smokes
3. Super Biggie Size Drink
4. Headphones
5. Mascara

--> Zoom Zoom! Make sure there is no space that a car could fit in that you do not occupy first!

Happy driving!!